Blood Will Tell

The Crankies' Girl Cousins came to visit this weekend, leaving Meta Cranky slack-jawed at the  brains, talent, and chutzpah packed into her maternal line's DNA. Griot-quality historical memories. Swear vocabularies eloquent enough to make the Big Lebowski weep. Plus, they speak math, giving rise to conversations rarely heard in Chez Cranky: "I told her, it's the Pythagorean theorem, for god's sake. You just plug in the numbers!" 


In their wee days, Girl Cousins spent untold hours at the farm of maternal grandmother, whom we'll call Molly Bloom. In barns with sheer drops of 20 feet from hay mow to floor. In pickup trucks with minimal safety features, driven by 12-year-olds. In watering tanks surrounded by cow plop and covered in mossy ooze. Girl Cousins brought along archival pictures, including one of small children entertaining themselves in dirt road in front of the grandmother's home. Those children might have been sitting there for five hours, since Molly Bloom's house was not about childhood enrichment; small children were not provided with craft activities to help them with summer reading lists or foreign language acquisition. Instead, they were locked outside until mealtime. The hours that yawned between lunch and dinner provided Girl Cousins life lessons in patience and tenacity: Smart girls can go to school and buy their own houses, and they go in any time they want.

Girl Cousins all bear a family resemblance to Meta Cranky's mother, sharing either Cranky Sergeant's  features, height-challenged stature, or no-nonsense attitude. Watching in appreciation, MC thinks she identified the Crankies' Maternal Line Organizing Principle (MLOP), and it has something to do with resiliency. All the Girl Cousins have coped with a grief or disappointment not with navel-gazing, but with a particularly vigorous grace and lack of self-pity. As Cranky #2 learned, their focus on action and results creates a No Whining Zone in which even the youngest are expected to plumb their depths and to figure out what they're made of. And guess what? Pouring your own milk can be a thrill. What the MLOP seems to favor is patience to teach those who can learn, gratitude for those who have taught them, and an utter ferocity with assholes.

Molly Bloom, for all her failings, may be the fountainhead of the MLOP. In her heyday, she was enormous, domineering, and profane, and yet the neighborhood beat a path to her door because she was so much fun. She was all about yes I said yes I will Yes and not so much about maternal support or unmitigated love. Girl Cousins have taken her best, improving ribaldry with kindness, and made it even better.
--MC
*MC thinks the photo credits go to Girl Engineer Cousin and Cranky Cousin.